The Superman/Superwoman Syndrome

Over the last few days, I have been doing an emotional inventory of sorts as part of a book that I am reading.  On page 24 of her book, A Course in Weight Loss, by Marianne Williamson, she gives an exercise to give you a "meaningful opportunity to see your light, by being courageous enough to look at your darkness."

As I have done this, I have realized how much emotional baggage I carry around with me all the time.  I carry my past, my hurts, my failures, my fears, my pains, my husband's and children's fears, pains and stresses.  I carry all of my responsibilities, my anxieties, my grief, my injustices, selfishness, and emotions from pain with me. Worst of all, I carry all of the blame and judgments that I have held against myself and others because I have not truly forgiven them.

As I did this work, I began to realize how much I have carried.  No wonder I am overweight, I am carrying too much in my energy field.  Over time, this settles in our bodies, because our bodies physically represent what we focus on energetically and emotionally.  By completing the writing assignment you write on many different emotions.  Then she has you to ask God to help you tear down the wall that you have built around yourself.  And to take all that you have been holding onto.  She uses different words and has more to the exercise.  I would encourage you to check the book out for yourself.

What I realized mostly from this is I have been behaving most of my life like Superwoman.  I can handle it, it is my job to handle it, it is my purpose to handle it all.  I have always believed in God and practiced that belief.  I pray and believe in prayer very much.  But somehow, I have never relinquished my control.  I ask for help, yes.  I even ask for His will to be done.  But I always have this part of me that believes, "I" can handle anything.  I am strong, I am courageous, see how much I have done, or how I have survived.  Yes, that is true, but God has always been with me or carrying me.  The truth is I tend to use Him as a back up plan or foundation of underlying support rather than a partner in my life.  He is at the core of who I am and I rely on His strength and love.  But Superwoman I am not.  The truth is we are at our strongest when we are allow ourselves to be vulnerable, admit we are weak, and ask for His help.

A big part of my lesson right now, is to let go of my burdens, and to give them to God.  That is where I am now.  I am giving Him my stresses, hurts, pains, painful emotions and asking Him to carry them for me.  It is no co-incidence that this is Lent (in the Christian religion and traditions).  Preparations are being made for Easter.  He is carrying the Cross for all of us, so that our sins may be forgiven and we can celebrate in the resurrection.  The resurrection offers new or renewed hope, new life and rebirth.  

I no longer need to be superwoman.  I never did.  I do need acknowledge and accept where I am.  I am releasing my need for control and my negative baggage.  I choose to forgive myself for my faults and fears and to forgive others who have hurt me and I have wrongly accused.  It is mostly my misperceptions that have kept me burdened and overwhelmed.  I choose to trust God and allow him to carry my burdens.  I choose to allow me to love myself and others, focusing on creating a life filled with love, joy and happiness.

I know that where my thoughts and emotions flow that the physical will manifest.  I know God is Love and He loves me.  I know God wants me to be free and happy.  I know God wants me to be healthy.  I know God wants me to trust and believe in Him and His power.  And I know that my light and life come from Him to I am here to be an example of  love and light to the world.  I am here as His disciple.  I am a divine child of God.  Created in His image of Love.  He is my Divine Father.  And each lesson I learn in life, brings me closer to Him and my divine nature as a child of God.

In Light & Love,
With Infinite Love & Gratitude for Life,
Debbie

Living as a martyr :(

I have been feeling better.  Opening up more and not feeling so victimized.  Since Ryan's session with me about 2 weeks ago, I have been more open to eating.  My general response to eating was all judgment and guilt based.  Ruled out so many foods as not good for me that there was not much I felt I could eat.  Then when I did, it was not enough or was binge eating.  Still not always making the healthiest choices, but I am eating more.

What I really need to increase is movement and water.  He is doing another session today, perhaps from then on I can work those in.

I'm paying attention to how my emotions are related to my eating.  When I am hurt, angry or bored, I eat.  I then feel guilt and withdraw into myself.  When I feel hurt, angry or anger comes my way I go immediately into a fear and survival mode. Over time, I would try to avoid any conflict.  I became a people pleaser and gave/give my power away to feel safe.  I have done this consciously and willingly.  I have hidden the anger and hurt.  Each time I forgive with a deep love.  But I have not been able to dispense of the hurt and anger within me.   The conflict of the love hate relationship gets more complicated with my earth shrine elements (Karla McKlaren - "Energetic Boundaries") and weak boundaries.

In essence, I absorb others emotions as my own.  It may be in the form of worry for children, being  over-sympathetic for another's problems, stress, or anger.

I have chosen to sacrifice myself for them, becoming a martyr. Using my energy as a conduit for them and their emotions., rather than thriving for my own life. I behave as if I am somehow protecting them but the reality is, I am not.  I am keeping them from growing and learning lessons that are their journey, not mine. My journey has become their journey.  That leaves me tired, lethargic, depressed and overweight.  In my mind, as a wife and mother my job is to love, guide and support my family.  I have been overly compassionate and sympathetic.

By turning my beliefs and behavior around and learning to honor my own life and boundaries I can teach them much more.  If I model self love and taking care of myself first instead of last I will model success for them.  

In light and love,
With infinite Love & Gratitude,
Debbie

A 2 yr old little girl loses her voice & stuffs her emotions

I have been hiding inside myself, building a cocoon of fat around me afraid of being hurt and of rejection.  Have I been hurt, yes.  Have I been rejected, yes.  I don't know of anyone who hasn't been hurt or rejected.  So what is it that has brought me to this place of being overweight and so emotionally challenged. Yes, emotions do have a big part to do with my being overweight.  I do not have a healthy relationship with food.  I eat when I am out of balance. I eat when I am happy (to celebrate) but mostly when I am sad, lonely, depressed, angry or when I have emotions that I stuff down with food.    When I am overwhelmed or experience many of the above emotions (save happiness) I eat unhealthy food.  At these times, I cannot find the courage or voice to speak out and express the emotion that I am feeling.

That alone would be enough to cause one to become overweight, but I also have tapes playing in my head.  These relate to what I eat and more importantly what I do not eat.  Diet books, t.v. programs, everywhere I turn tells me eat this, don't eat that.  So I have become very good at don't eat that cheese, it's not good for you, don't eat those chips, they aren't good for you.  Do eat this and this, but not with this.  So I now add quilt to my dysfunctional relationship with food.  That makes me eat even more.  The truth is I actually under eat and I'm getting fatter. I am the only one in my family who eats salad for lunch.  I try to avoid sugary foods and processed foods.  That works about half the time.  Nutritionally, my body is starving.

From my training and research two main issues are emotions and toxins.   The truth is that adipose or fat cells store "things" in them that are not good for us.  Our bodies are designed to work without our conscious involvement.  We don't tell it to pump blood or breathe it just does, so it takes nutrients and health from what is good for it.  What happens to the excess, or to the toxicity and how are emotions involved?  In order to save the vital organs, it stores the foods that are not nutritional and many toxins in the fat cells.  Our fat cells are actually protecting us from ourselves.  For more information, I recommend reading The Gabriel Method by Jon Gabriel.  

My husband, Ryan, has written a Lifeline Technique(R)  portal to use in conjunction with other techniques he has acquired.  He did a session on me about two weeks ago.  It was very powerful.  He uncovered a subconscious 2 year old part of me that could not find her voice and speak her truth.  That 2 year old little girl was hurt.  She also felt rejection.  She began a pattern of withdrawal and not speaking up for herself that eventually led to disability at 16 and obesity at 52.  I felt too small, inadequate and insignificant to speak up at age 2.  I did not feel wanted and loved.  It did not mean I was not loved and wanted.  I am an adult now, and I know that a child's perception is not the same as that of an adult, especially a parent,  A child cannot understand a parent's perception. And likewise a parent does not see or perceive the way a child does.  I am not blaming here.  There is no blame to be had.  I am saying that this 2 year old little part of me still remains feeling small, inadequate and insignificant.  As I grew chronically older, that 2 yr old pattern kept repeating over and over through the years.  Any time I felt rejected, hurt or unloved I was still unable to speak and stuffed the emotions inside.  Food was my comfort and friend and easily available.  I loved food.  And I hated food for the "control" it had over me.

In order to survive the body can, and in my case has become larger and is subconsciously shouting to the world, "look at me, don't you see me."  I am not small, inadequate or insignificant.  I am large. I am enough. I am significant.  Ironically, though the larger I get, the more invisible I feel.  People ignore me, don't want to relate to me, and ignore me.  

Where does that leave me?  Now what? Well, that two year old part of me had been happy. Now a child of divorce and a with a new dad; a part of me was not happy.  My subconscious was saying: "I'm not happy, I can't speak up, it's not safe to speak up." I withdrew.  I want to survive and live.  My life is not mine anymore. That's how it felt.  Part of my will had been broken.  Around the age of six I became a people pleaser.  I started giving up my own needs and desires to make others happy.  

As I became a mom myself, my nurturing and protection of my kids led me to taking on their emotions as well.  They weren't mine to take but I felt it was helping them.  Now I know it is their journey and not mine, but it has added to my weight.  

I am noticing myself changing.  The first thing I have noticed is that I am not judging what I eat like I did before.  If I want something, I eat it.  I also used to find myself saying, "leave the apples for the kids".   Now I am saying, "it's ok, you can have an apple too.  You deserve to be healthy.  I am nurturing myself.  I am also telling myself, I choose to be happy.  I am comfortable being happy.  I want to thrive." I have post it notes on my mirror saying, "I am comfortable being happy" and "I choose to thrive."  I am happier.   Each day, I have been feeling better emotionally.  The better I feel emotionally the more active I become.  I am at peace with the two year old part of me.  She now has a voice.  The more I let her speak the better I feel too.

The more I embrace myself, the more myself I become.

With Infinite Love & Gratitude,

Debbie  

From can't to I believe.

From I can't to I believe.

In the last post I talk about using our thoughts and whispers from spirit to find new thoughts and beliefs.  This change can be a baby step or a leap.  It all depends on how open you are to new ideas and how far you can stretch your imagination.  Then you take a leap of faith, which may make you feel vulnerable.  After all you are looking for something new.  That can be a bit scary.  But to face our challenges brings us bit by bit out of our comfort zone. Remember Cant does not exist anymore he is now Ibelieve.  So lets look through the eyes of Ibelieve.

Ibelieve knows where he is in his current situation.  Picture your challenge or fear that you want to change.

Now picture you in your new reality.  If it is weight loss, or a healthier lifestyle for you then picture yourself the way you want to be.  Imagine yourself feeling healthier.  Think thoughts of I believe I can be a healthier.  I believe I can add ten minutes of exercise or stretching in my day.  I believe I can eat one more fruit or vegetable than I did today.  I believe I can find a friend or someone to call and support me on this journey.

Maybe you are shy and want to communicate better and be more confident.  Picture yourself being friendly and approaching someone new and starting a conversation.  Make it easy and superficial at first.  Try to do that once each day.  Maybe after a week or so, you feel comfortable with a particular person, ask them if they would like to meet for coffee or join you in an activity you enjoy.  

The key here is not to jump to success and instant transformation.  It is about focusing of believing you can do this.  It will take practice and affirmations several times each day.  I can.  I can.  I can.  I want to.  I will.  I have support.  The goal is to get to a place where you can picture yourself being this new you.  Focus on FEELING that way.  Let that feeling grow.  If it is thin, feel thin.  If it is confident feel confident.  Smile confidently.  Tell yourself you can't help but feel confident.  It's your nature.  I am confident, or thin, or brave, or etc.  Whatever your challenge or stress is make a step or write a plan to help you reach your goal. Commit to yourself to that goal.  Forget about the past all that exists is this moment and the goal ahead of you.

When Ego B. Mind starts interrupting your new thoughts and beliefs tell him to go away.  He is no longer serving you because you won't accept anything less than success.  Ask Spirit Lead Me to come and reinforce your new beliefs and chase the old patterns away.  Spirit will always remind you anything is possible and not to give up.  Feel the determination and go back to feeling I believe again.  

Commit yourself to doing this for 1 week. Put post it notes around your house. Set an alarm on your phone and do your affirmation each time it goes off.  See how you feel.  Keep up the practice.  Smile at yourself and others.  Belief is always in you.  

I have done this and am doing it again with you now, so let's get started. It's never to late to begin!

With Infinite Love and Gratitude!

Debbie

Belief and success

In order to move forward and make success a reality, we must look at and acknowledge where we have been and are.  It is a matter of getting a broader perspective on one's situation and also of owning where you are now.  Much like someone who has fallen into a deep ravine.  You look up and note where you are and assess what the situation is so you can make a plan to move forward.   Your initial reaction may be shock, denial, rejection or loss of will or hope.  You may say there is no way, I can't, I don't know how, or I don't have what I need to get out of this situation.  The outcome totally results from your choices.

Some people will choose to make no decision seeing no way out.  I will call him Cant.  Cant becomes paralyzed with fear and inaction because he feels he has no choice becomes a victim.  The key here is what is he a victim to. Is Cant really a victim of circumstance or to the thoughts and beliefs in his mind?  Cant believes and feels he will stay in this ravine.

Another person falls into that same ravine.  We will call him Will.  He assesses the situation.  He sees no way out but opens his mind to other possibilities.  Will starts using the power of imagination .  Will refuses to accept being stuck.  "I want to get out of here.  I want to live.  I want to see my family again.  I choose life."  Will takes small steps, one at a time until success is achieved.  Will actively believes and feels himself getting out and does.

Cant has developed a pattern of giving in.  Repeated failures have left him weak and beaten down.  Cant suffers low self esteem and determination.  He has lost his strength and inner voice.  His best friend has become Ego B. Mind.  He needs a new friend,  That friend is Spirit Lead Me.

Still lost in the ravine Cant looses his friend Mind.  And meets Spirit.  Spirit begins to talk to him, first in whispers.  "Anything is possible.  Don't give up.  Believe there is a way."  Cant starts to believe.  As his belief grows he begins to feel determined.  He chooses a different outcome and learns to succeed.

Knowing that he has been given a second chance at life he changes his name to Ibelieve.
 

Weight, Depression and Freedom: A Journey of Love

Months have crept by since I last blogged and also have extra and unwanted pounds slowly crept into my tissues.  It's winter now.  It is a time to  go within, find comfort, warmth and solitude.  If I were a bear I would be well prepared for a long winter.  Winter is a time for reflection.  Sometimes, we stay in winter mode for longer than the winter months.  That has been my state.  I haven't blogged for over a year. Wow.  Where have I been?  I asked myself that question.  I don't really know. Hours turned into days, and days into a year and a half.  Busy, occupied and sometimes lost. Life happened and I withdrew and escaped into it and myself.  I have had a broken leg, been in the hospital and therapy for 3-6 months.  Still not recuperated, actually have lots of work to go.  In the process I have gained more weight and struggle to keep myself going.  I have grieved what happened and where I am.  I have been angry and resentful.  I have prayed for help, of course looking for a specific outcome.  That outcome has not happened because I have not taken action to make it come about.  Now I'm tired of grieving. tired of going downhill.  From deep inside me my soul is calling me to wake up, find and claim my own strength. I have been looking outside of myself for someone or something to help me.  And I have had help.  I have received LifeLine sessions and energy work that have revealed hurt and the loss of my own voice or inability to speak up for myself.  I have been learning very important lessons during this time. I have been writing in my journal and discovering thought patterns and false beliefs that I have been replaying in my head.  They have not been helping me.  They have kept me trapped.  I have been living in the past, which really translates to existing but not really living at all.   The help I need comes from within and has always been inside of me.  It comes from my inner-self, my heart and my soul.  I come from God, from the divine.  I am a spark which emanates from the One Divine Living Flame we call God. I have been denying that I am a child of God and that my strength comes from him.

So rather than listen to the voice in my head that says, I can't do this, or it's too hard to do that; I am choosing to listen to my heart.  My heart tells me that all things are possible.  My heart tells me to love myself and to take care of myself.  It tells me I have all that I need and to live with gratitude.  It tells me I am alive and to celebrate that life.

It is snowing heavily outside.  The first heavy snow of the winter even though it is the end of February.  The huge heavy flakes are falling like rain.  Which is rather ironic because inside me I feel like spring.  Ready to burst forth with renewed energy and full of belief in myself.  I can see myself getting better and wanting to put forth the effort to get better.  I really feel like I can do it.

I am going to share this with you.  I will be telling you what I have discovered about myself recently and what changes  are taking place.  So pull up a chair, a cup of coffee and a tall glass of good healthy water and listen while I tell a story about me and perhaps about you too.  For we are all children of God, in search of our own divine spark of life, joy and happiness from within!

A Journey shared with heartfelt Infinite Love and Gratitude,
Debbie

Stress Relief

We all have times we are overloaded with stress. We need a quick way to transmute our feelings to get through the moment. That is what I want to share with you today. The stress will still need to be faced and the root causes revealed, however when it is a 10 out of 10, you can do one of the following!

I think my favorite way is visualization.

Close your eyes and envision a bridge in front of you. On the other side of the bridge is where you want to be. The land of_____. It might be peaceful, happy, relaxed... What ever it is, it is NOT Stress. In might be in control, in charge, confident, powerful. See what you want to be on the other side of that bridge. Give it color, focus, zoom in, what do you see, what do you feel. Now step on that bridge. Keep your focus on the other side. Allow yourself to become a part of the other side. Take another step. Feel yourself changing. Feel the emotions shift. With each step, you feel more enabled and happier. As you reach the top of the bridge, look down and across the view on the other side. You can see it all now. Your awareness of it is vivid and you are feeling your excitement build as you realize you are always in control and can choose to release stress in any form and let things be as they are. You do not need to hold it, move through and allow yourself to look back on the other side of the bridge. Where you came from, it is behind you, a part of your past. You now choose what path you are going to take to be in the Land of I am____. Walk or run across the remainder of the bridge, allowing yourself to feel your feet hit the ground on the other side. Become part of the environment there. You have envisioned it. Now create it!

Another way I find very helpful is to ground yourself.

Take a deep breath in. As you breathe out, allow the stress you are holding to go down to the earth. Let it go through the topsoil, through the clay, through the rock, through the water, to the core of the earth. The earth will transform and purify it. The earth will filter and take out all stress and return to you her constant love and nurturing. Keep breathing in and out feeling calmer and more loved with each breath. All is well, all is good. Let the breath continue to flow. You can also view yourself with water pouring over you, washing away the stress and cleansing you, leaving you refreshed and revitalized. As you breath in again, allow yourself to let to of the stress, feel yourself relaxing. You have the newness of a flower opening up with the sunshine enveloping it. Keep doing this until you really feel the energy of being refreshed.

With infinite Love and Gratitude to you!

Debbie

Your energy ball

We each give out energy. Our center is energy. The core of who we are. We are created as beings of pure love energy. As we grow the energy flows through us easily with love or it can become clouded, tainted and dense if we become filled with fear and "negativity". If we do not know how to release these emotions of fear and negativity they become part of who we are. We then project that energy out to others and our world. I am reflecting my life and energy outwards. You are reflecting your life and energy outwards as well.

The question is what are we each accepting and then choosing to reflect and project out. We may not even be aware of the beliefs and energies that we have taken on. The first step is to examine and question our current state of awareness. Our choices now poses several other questions. First, is whether you are reflecting the past, present or future? If you are reflecting your past, you are reliving part of your past and keeping much of your energy bogged down with what if's, I wish, or if only's. That is usually not positive energy, because if the past was positive you would be focusing your energy on the present or future. If your energy is being focused in the future, you are probably very busy and may have a combination of energies you work in and out of. So your energy may give out conflicting signals. If you are living for the future while not liking what you are doing you are probably unhappy. I am pretty confident that if you are choosing to live in either of these states, you are in fact unhappy? Why? Because you are not living in this moment, in your own power. You believe either that you have no choice and are stuck in the past or that you have to sacrifice yourself for the future, both prevent you from living in the present. Did you realize that you have another choice, which is to live in the present? If you are focused in the present, chances are you are well balanced and are sending out loving energy, because you are present in mind, body and spirit right now. You are probably calm, peaceful and happy.

The second consideration is if you are choosing to reflect from your inner self of who you are or are you mirroring from the beliefs of your family, culture or society? If you have been successful an balancing your emotional, spiritual and physical health, you are probably very confident, secure and living from your own sense of self. You would then be connected to your inner self and not preoccupied with what others think, want or reflect.

Third, what is your life's purpose and passion. What powers YOU? Do you own your power of self understanding and self love being connected to the world and universe in a harmonious and beneficial way. Have you found your place in the world? Are you choosing to reflect from your inner self of who you are deep in your core or are you mirroring from the beliefs of your family, culture or society? We often believe that we need this or that to be happy. We have been told that this is necessary or is demanded. Deep within each of us is the common truth? What should or do we need to do to survive or be productive? We may believe that we are unworthy, not confident, unable, or unsafe to be happy. We either live from limiting ourselves and not being true to our own spirit or we allow ourselves to be driven by our spirit. From this place we allow life to flow with ease. We are each born worthy, we are each born with potential and unlimited possibilities.

There is one truth that rings true with my soul. That truth is that everything is energy. We are energy, the same energy that we are created from. Inside each of us is a spark of light, our soul a part of the divine. Our bodies are uniquely designed to flow and grow. How our energy moves and grows is based upon the perceptions and beliefs that we have accepted as truth. But these perceptions and beliefs are not really truths. We are here to grow and learn. But many of us have been or are lost. We become lost in our stories, our pasts, our cultures, our limits, our dreams or our nightmares. We become lost in thoughts instead of living from our spirit within.

I'm gonna ask you to close your eyes and imagine yourself in a peaceful and serene area. You are happy and content. There is an abundance of beauty and nature in all its glory around you. Your heart is alive and joyful. You sense harmony. Birds are singing, trees are lush, flowers and plant and animal life thrive. Expand that feeling? Pay attention to what is around you. What time is it, what year is it., who is with you? What do you picture?

Everything you need is yours. What is this utopia that you are picturing?

For me it is harmony, communion with nature, people, animals and all plant life. There are loved ones and friends. I live on the land, planting and thriving with all life. I don't need things, or to be entertained, so to speak. I live with the spark of life of the Divine communicating to and through me. It is simple. It is freeing. It is joyful. It is love. There is no fear. There just is an infinite universe of love, harmony and existence. There is community, sharing, acceptance, love, compassion and peaceful interaction.

In this vision, everything is connected. Everything is part of the same energy. Reacting and responding to everything around it. The wind blows the tree branches sway. Everything has an effect to everything else. A push/pull but everything balances out.

Our lives are the same. We reflect out and affect others and our environment. A ripple effect is created. Hate produces anger, anger produces hate. When a different perception is accepted or we refuse to accept that energy because we realize it is untrue, the hate transforms. If you own your power, refuse to accept another's anger or hate you can remain in the present moment AND you can have an effect upon them, because at the very least they will wonder why you don't care about their anger or hate. They will feel your truth and energy. If you are feeling love and not hate, they will feel that love. They will then have the choice to accept that as their truth. It may take time, but Love produces love.

What is your life, the YOU that powers you. What is your significance? What is your connection to the world? What is it that brings you peace. What is your true inner knowing.

We each are unique and individual but we are not separate from the whole. We are still connected to all others and life. We are called to step into our own shoes so to speak, for maybe your choice is to go barefoot. Are you living your life according to your true purpose? In your connection to all other life, are you acting out of love and possibilities? We are each here to connect and interact with life. This journey is important. Each choice we make and everything around us has an impact on life. Whichever you choose, your choice does have an impact on others and your environment. What is your energy ball? How are you affecting others and life on this planet and universe?

Blessings,

With Infinite Love & Gratitude,

Debbie

Firing the Judge and jury.

Who is the judge and who are the jury members?

Each of us begins as a free spirit. We feel, we hunger and thirst, we see and we want.

Then we learn. We learn from others around us. Don Miguel Ruiz calls it domestication. Most of us become very adept at it. We accept what others tell us when we are young and believe it too. At first our parents appear as the judges. We conform to their rules and beliefs and behaviors. Then we become our own judges. We have learned "right" from "wrong" and we even judge some of what we were taught as "correct" or not by our agreements.

There is a great problem here. As young children, we also are thirsty for love and attention. Our parents are our first authority. (Note: I am not talking about teenagers here. They have already begun the transition of becoming their own judges.) But before then, We believe that we have to earn it. When we are told no, or that we have done something wrong or bad, we may come to believe that it is us who are wrong or bad. We also pick up many incorrect messages and internalize them as our truth. We may start to believe we are not good enough. Our self confidence may be wounded and we weave a reality about ourselves and our lives that are a false identity. They are total lies. But they become our vision of reality. We begin to see limitations, faults, doubt in ourselves. We believe the lies of society. We are not pretty enough, smart enough, good enough. How many of us were told to shut up or go away, never you mind, it's none of your business, etc. There were very likely gentler ways to communicate what they meant. The real problem is that what we heard is: your opinion does not count, I do not want to hear or see you, you are not good enough or valued enough to be included.

The real truth is that we are good enough. We are smart enough, pretty enough, valuable, talented, worthy and lovable.

The people and environments in our lives may not have been able to communicate that to us, we may not have felt it and we certainly may not have been able to dig deep within ourselves to say or shout:

HEY YOU, I AM GOOD ENOUGH! AS A MATTER OF FACT I AM PERFECT. I AM THE ONLY ME THERE IS. I HAVE A PURPOSE, LIGHT AND TRUTH. I AM A SPIRIT OF PURE LOVE. I CAN DO ANYTHING I BELIEVE. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE. I AM STRONG. CONFIDENT AND BEAUTIFUL.

The GOOD news here is that right here and now, no matter you age, you can release all that negative self talk and old beliefs that held you back. Fire that judge and jury that have kept you limited. Choose to live in love that you were born to live and release the fear and all negativity.

It is your time to shine. It is you time to begin a new journey of awakening. The journey to empowerment of yourself and living your purpose and reaching your heart's desire.

Are you ready?

In the quiet of the night, in the calm of the day remember who you are. We each write our own life path. We each have our vision and choices. Can you choose to pull your energy and truth to yourself and be true to yourself? Can you create a new life free of the opinions or judgments of others.

Can you say each and every day:

I AM GOOD ENOUGH! AS A MATTER OF FACT I AM PERFECT. I AM THE ONLY ME THERE IS. I HAVE A PURPOSE, LIGHT AND TRUTH. I AM A SPIRIT OF PURE LOVE. I CAN DO ANYTHING I BELIEVE. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE. I AM STRONG. CONFIDENT AND BEAUTIFUL. I CHOOSE TO REJECT ANYTHING THAT DOES NOT REFLECT LOVE AND LIGHT IN MY LIFE.

Peace and love,

With Infinite Love and Gratitude,

Debbie

Living passionately

I accept this life on earth.

What is your first reaction to this statement?

Do you say, "yes, absolutely" or do you feel twinges or resistance, anger or resentment?

How we internalize and flow with life determines how we will respond. We CAN change our response. If our past belief has been that we have had no choice in our reaction to life, then that belief keeps us from happiness and peace. It is so easy to resist parts of our life or past that are unpleasant. The voice in our head can play like a scratched record album, "If only....., If only....., If only...., my life would be different. I would be happy."

Well, everyone has their "story". The difference is whether or not we flow with life and accept all that is or whether we choose to resist and refuse life as it is. We all know of people who have tragic life stories and never give up. They persevere and end up happy and prosperous. We also know of people who have had tragic life stories that envelope them like a steel tomb that leaves them depressed and empty. They give up hope and resist life. They see themselves as victims, martyrs not as strong invincible warriors. What is the difference between these two groups of people. Which have you been? Which one do you want to be?

Think back to a time in grade school or junior high when you were introduced to competing against others. Did you feel confident in yourself? Or did you perceive others as more confident or better than you? Did you think, they will get it, they are more popular than me? Did you think, I can do anything I want. What exactly is it that makes some people "popular"? Does that make them happy? Were you or they just trying to fit in by being what others wanted them to be? Do they also feel they are not as good and have the same fears?

Regardless of what answers you gave to the above questions, the difference is whether there was balance in their life.

If you are creative and energetic, people want to be with you. Your fire element is strong and you consume and create life. If you are grounded and believe that your needs will be met regardless of circumstances, you will not judge your view of yourself upon the circumstances in life. Your earth element is nurturing and sustaining. If you are able to discern when to be strong and when to be flexible, you can easily transform and deflect what happens in life. Then your metal element is malleable allowing you to deflect and not own what is not yours and to flow through events easily. Again perceived by others as strength and positive either way. If it is your habit to take the path of least resistance, you will flow with the river of life and will not keep the unwanted judged "dirt" of life in your mind or body. Your water element will be bubbly, alive, flowing and again, healthy. The wood element is one of the strongest elements which represent our balance. When you are strongly rooted in life believe in yourself, you stand proud and tall like an oak, redwood, willow, or any tree by getting stronger with each passing storm. You will flourish and reach out to others sharing and giving. A healthy wood element is thriving and empowering. Breathe in a deep breath of fresh clean air. The air element with you allows you breathe in the breath of life that comes from the ultimate source of unconditional love and creation. That breath enables each of us to love others. Our actions will represent a spirit of wholeness and love that comes in with each breath. This wholeness, this spark of light that is deep within us is that which keeps us alive. The more we use it the more it radiates and shines for all to see.

The good news is that no matter where you are right now you have it within you to attain that balance. No one can do it for you. Each of us stands alone, as a flickering candle, we can gain strength and resonance when we join with others. Focus on your heart and soul. See a brilliant light shining deep within you. As you breathe in and out see that light getting brighter and brighter. See yourself as accepting and loving life. See yourself as creative and passionate about life. See yourself as grounded and accepting of life on this beautiful planet. See yourself and flexible able to stand strong or bend like the branches of a tree blowing in the wind. See yourself as water flowing gently through life following the path of least resistance or powerfully strong when the need arises to maintain balance. See yourself and a mighty oak deeply rooted in life, strong and loving reaching out to the sky and all other life basking in the beauty of life. See yourself as a spirit of pure love, loving yourself and others free of judgment and divinely inspired and connected to the source of all that is.

I accept this life on earth. I love my life. I love myself.

I accept this life on earth. I love my life. I love myself.

I accept this life on earth. I love my life. I love myself.

Blessings my friends.

Shine brightly. Breathe deeply. Love unconditionally. Live passionately. Be inspiration. Live in spirit with spirit.

With infinite love and gratitude,

Debbie

Certified Lifeline Practitioner

Seeing your life differently - rewriting your story.

Today I am focusing on beliefs, perceptions, and judgments that we accepted and believed as a young child. It is extremely important to realize that the messages we internalize may not be those that the people in our lives were giving us. For example, as a child you may ask a question just when the phone is ringing and dinner is burning, you may get a harsh response and believe they do not care about you, when the response has nothing to do with you. You just do not see the situation the from the same perspective. Even when a parent apologizes, the child may still hold self doubt. This journey may allow you to change your view of reality, of your life and of yourself. I encourage you to start or add these to your journal writings.

How have you viewed your early childhood life from the aspects of stability, safety. and security? Was your view of your feelings of life then one of trust or distrust? Did you feel sustained and rooted in life and with yourself and your surroundings? Was there turmoil, instability or confusion in your environment? Remember "Leave it to Beaver" was a tv show not reality. Don't judge your life against that, just be honest and open.

As you are going over these questions, do you view the circumstances or situation of that time as full acceptance of life on earth, or do you feel a sense of resistance, fear, anger or bitterness?

As children we are born into families. All family situations differ. Many times, families or parents do not have the ability to love freely or completely. Here I am not passing judgment. I am saying that many of us were never able to really love ourselves. We may have felt judged, insecure, unsupported, lacking and unstable. Often the people in our lives did not truly know how to love and accept themselves. They may have been living a life of pain or insecurity. They could not love others unconditionally because they might not have known what it was to love themselves. They tried to fit in and earn love. They did not feel they were lovable just for being. There may have always been strings attached.

There are several key points here. One is that there is no fault or blame. Each person does the best they can. Each parent loves their children the best they can. Rather than blaming and judging for others perceived imperfections we would do better to focus on the brokenness and loss of wholeness that they may have experienced. This puts us in a state of compassion and forgiveness.

Once we accept, love and forgive our life for not being what we may not have consciously chosen, we can move on. Living in the past and reliving our hurts over and over keeps us trapped, unhealthy and we are not living in love.

The good news here is that after we let go of the past we can start moving on. We start to create the life we want by realizing that we are creators. We need to accept the we are each born by a loving creator and are a soul of pure love. Innocent little lovable babies. In this state we are more like the animal kingdom. We are part of nature and nurture. We know how to suckle, we respond to fear and love and comfort in healthy ways. As we learned and developed our egos we lose touch with that pure little spirit of love and joy. We start to form opinions and beliefs about who we are. They are lies, but we believe them. We do not know any better. But now you have the ability to change and see the truth.

Starting today I ask each of us to repeat the following affirmations. Add others if they pop into your mind!

• I accept this life on earth.
• I am safe, secure and stable. All my needs will be met.
• I trust life.
• I am a divine spark of life.
• I have all I need within myself.
• My life is a balance of a relationship with earth and the source of creation and infinite love.
• I trust myself. I trust my intuition. My knowing from within.
• I choose to question false beliefs that I have held.
• It is okay to experience my emotions, accept them and own the power of truth within me.
• I am strong. I am loving.
• I have free will and a choice to choose a different path than I have been on.

You may want to write a letter to yourself, one to your mother and one to your father. Feel your emotional pain and release it. Tell yourself that you are now choosing to rewrite your life from the truth not your false perceptions of reality, judgments and pain. You are going to create a loving child who loves themselves for the beauty within regardless of what you may have encountered outside of yourself. Tell yourself, This or that happened or I felt that. It is over now and I survived. I am O.K. I choose to let it go and to live a life of giving and receiving love and not living in pain or lies. I WANT TO LIVE AND LOVE. If you need to write about your anger write it and release it. Forgive it. Write a letter to others (don't send it) just let them know how you felt and forgive them. Perhaps you may want to burn it after to complete letting go.

As you do this, you will feel more courageous, freer, lighter and more empowered. You will be taking your power back. You will be deciding to see your life in a much different way.

If I can be of assistance to you, please contact me 630-730-1228 or dgagala@comcast.net. You may also visit my website www.purposepassionvision.com.

Debbie

Certified LifeLine Practitioner

Birth into life with free will, choice & connection to Source

One of my mentors is Don Miguel Ruiz. In his book, The Fifth Agreement, he talks about our false self and our true self. It is about happiness versus unhappiness.

As young children we are wild, free, without self-consciousness and self-judgement. We speak the truth and live in the moment (p.12) Then we begin the process of domestication and the development of the ego. We learn behaviors, beliefs, judgments based upon the people and environment around us. We agree with them because we are dependent upon others for our care and survival. "After domestication, we try to be good enough for ourselves, because we can never live up to our image of perfection. We look for what we have lost. As we become more mature, we begin searching again for our "true self, for love, for truth". And we are searching for all of these things outside of ourselves, because that is where we believe we will find it. We are not happy." p.14

Our whole lives we have accepted limitations, beliefs of others that tell us we are not good enough, there is no perfection and we begin habits of settling and unhappiness. We look for someone to save us. The saving has to come from within, from yourself (from your second attention). Now we have the chance to unlearn all the lies and beliefs that we accepted when we gave our power and our divinity away. (p.148-149)

He goes on further to say, "Our identification and belief that we are not divine is our hell. Our creation of anything else outside of that is our false self, our separation from our divinity. P.129

As I have reflected on his messages and words, I have reexamined my own life and behaviors. My discovery is that I have been an extremely good student when it comes to listening to others in my life and giving my power away. The result, unfortunately has been separation from my true self and depression.

Many of us realize we may not be happy. But we are not really sure why. We all have our own choices to make in our lives. We do so the best we can. I would venture a guess that most of us also would not change most of our choices. I know that I am happy with all of the conscious choices I have made. That includes my spouse, children, education, faith/spirituality. However, there are many choices that I did not realize I was making, or that I could make a different choice. When we feel we have no choice, we can not see a way out. We allow our fear to take away our power and choice. At these times, we feel free will is a joke because we have allowed ourselves to believe we are a victim or martyr. We do not consciously choose this, this is a subconscious reaction based on emotions and experiences and perceptions that we did not have the tools, strategies or environment to react with love. We did what we believed from our limited false self and ego. The voice in our head. Ruiz calls that voice "knowledge".

Our soul is reaching out to us to awaken us in times of separation, depression, stress, or unhappiness. What we are called to awaken to is our truth, our power, our love of self, and our connection to our the divine. The divine, however has to be accessed from each of us individually. It is not something that we can search for outside of us. There are no answers outside. All answers come from within, from our spirit of pure love. Reconnecting to that spirit of pure love within us and making choices from a place of self love, truth allows us to use our free will in a healthy and empowering way. We then become free, full of joy and happy. It is a journey.

I am on this journey. Would you like to join me? I welcome each of you to follow me on this path of unlearning, learning and becoming all that we each are called to in this life. A journey to wholeness.

Ruiz calls "to learn to doubt. To doubt what we have believed and hear. To learn to accept and see ourselves as divine. That is truth. All else is lies. Have faith in yourself and follow every instinct you were born with. Have no doubt in who you are, trust yourself and trust life."

A very special Grandmother

Today, I write to honor my grandmother who passed yesterday. There are people who are truly angels in our lives. My grandmother was one. She lived a life with hardships, growing up in the depression without a father. She was raised by a mother with ten children. I am so blessed to be part of this family. Strength, character, humor, love, dedication, honor and above all a dedication to family. She lived her life strongly rooted to life, grounded and sturdy, steadfast and loving. She was compassionate and giving. She made life look so easy. There was a time and place for everything. She lived life with joy and laughter, appreciation and gratitude. She gave of herself lovingly. At times she felt as much like a mom as a grandma. Thats just how she was. All of these words seem so empty next to the depth of meaning and truth behind each one. This is not verbose but so very heartfelt.

She was and will always be one of my greatest blessings. Grandma I will honor you. I love you.

Forgiveness and Healing

Healing knows no color, race, or religion. Fear and hate keep us trapped in a continuing cycle of suffering. Acknowledging, accepting the pain and past and then making the decision to choose a new path of love for ones self and for the future generation is the real path to healing. Letting go and choosing forgiveness is not easy but it frees the spirit and soul within each of us.

What is it that you fear? What is it that you hate? Can you imagine yourself living without these fears and hate in your life? Can you begin to feel lighter, freer, and more loving.

Are you ready to begin the transformation of yourself to become more loving. Can you see yourself living a more empowered and fulling life?

Blessings to you on your journey. If you feel so inspired, I would be honored to work with you.

Debbie

Certified LifeLine Practitioner

630-730-1228

Rates negotiatble

The Making of a Happy New Year

As 2010 is now behind us, I look forward to leaving the old behind and creating the new. New Years wishes are not just wishes and hopes for fate to fall our way. Many wait for good things to happen to them and when something "bad" happens they feel like they have bad luck or are a victim. Whether or not we have a Happy New Year or not depends on who we are and who we want to become.

We do not have control over what happens to us. We can however, choose how we respond. We have a choice to reject acting out of fear or anger. Reaction is based upon survival. People get sick, people who we love die, failures occur, relationships are not always healthy. When we feel the emotions involved with these events, we feel angry, hurt, rejected, alienated, lonely, and unhappy. The truth is that no one is being punished. We are not unloved. We are actually being asked, "Who are you? What are you made of? Are you loving others in your life? Are you loving yourself? Are you taking care of yourself?

If there is someone in your life that is ill, have or can you reach out to them. What is your relationship to them like? What can you to make it better? Has someone in your life died or near death? Death is actually part of life. We want to push it away and defeat it. When it hurts us in some way we feel cheated. We feel lost. But we are not lost. Our loved one is not lost. We do however, need to find our way back to ourselves and who we are. Our loved one is still with us, though we may now need to depend upon ourselves now more without their direct input.

Likewise, if you have failed at something in your life, you are not a failure. You are not being punished. You have not reached your full level of strength yet, but you are getting stronger.

There are many steps to success. Take another step, gather your strength and resolve and move forward. If your relationship(s) are not fulfilling, again, you are being asked are you making it all you can? What has or hasn't happened in this relationship. Take a step to learn the lesson here. Find your truth in it and move forward to your happiness.

We are not here to be perfect but we are here to become more whole and happy. What steps can you take to be more whole and happy this year? Make it so.

With the LifeLine technique, I can guide you to find the answers you seek. The answers are within you, not me. Anything is possiblie, just take a chance, believe, and move forward. For a session, please do not hesitate to ask how a LifeLine can help you. Consultation is free.

With love and light,

Debbie

Certified LifeLine Practitioner

630-730-1228

Hope, Love, Joy

Hope, Love, Joy. That is what I am feeling today. As the celebration of Christmas with loved ones was shared, I find myself feeling contented. But the contentment that I am feeling is leaving me with a desire to reach out and share the feelings of hope, love and joy. I do not however, want to share or convince others that my hope, love and joy are what is right for them. I DO want to help them to find the hope, love and joy within their own soul. Your spirit always beckons to you to awaken to the the beauty that is within you. Often we feel separated from that part of us. Do not be fooled. The beauty may be hidden under a blanket of loss, hurt, pain, anger. But the fear that you may be hurt again is holding you back from allowing yourself to feel that hope, love and joy again.

Today, you can choose to listen to your spirit. Start to dissolve the walls that are keeping you from experiencing the joy of life again. The past is behind you. Awaken to the present moment, allow yourself to heal from the past and move forward in hope. You can begin to create a life of love and joy. You can feel it happening right now as you read this. Give yourself this most wonderful gift. Life lived each moment with happiness and joy. Breathe in hope and love. Doesn't that feel better?

Debbie,

Certified LifeLine Practitioner

630-730-1228

For appt call. Rates negotiable.

Peace, love, contentment

It is Christmas Eve and all is quiet. There is a gentle light snow falling outside. A feeling of peace, love and contentment is in the air. I send peace, love, hope to you. Believe in the unlimited possibilities the universe offers to us all. We only have to open to it and believe that we are worthy. You are, you know. You were created and will always be pure love and light. It is only your denial of that truth that makes you see yourself differently. You were born an innocent loving little baby, a little vessel, so anxious to love and be loved. We are here to love and to be loved. May you awaken to the love that you really are, your true self, which is always letting you know that you are pure love.

Anytime you feel any sort of discontent, unhappiness, pain, stress of challenge that is your signal that you are out of alignment with your true self and your call or opportunity to make it right again. I truly, truly wish to offer my services as a LifeLine Practitioner to help you to find and reclaim that part of you. To guide you to become whole, peaceful and purposefully happy in your life.

Blessings to each of you.

Debbie

Certified LifeLine Practitioner

630-730-1228

(phone sessions available)

Also ask about a sliding fee scale as global economies differ.

Giving from the Heart!!

One week till Christmas. As I reflect on years past, I recall smiles, joy and excitement! The anticipation of giving joy to someone. Letting them know in a tangible way that I want them to experience fun, joy and happiness and love.

It is in giving that we receive. It is in loving that we experience love. The spirit of the Season is just that. Love is an action of giving and of sharing from your heart to another. It is that easy. The gift is not a reflection of how much money was spent. When we tune in to another's desire we can give that to them in some way. We are showing love.

The best gifts, I truly believe are those that have meaning behind them. One year, as a young child, I remember my mom was on a diet and I wanted to give her a gift she could use. I went to the grocery store and bought her some nice red apples! They fit my budget, and showed my love and desire for her dreams to come true. It was my sentiment represented in a loving way.

My youngest daughter was the first to put gifts under our tree this year. She has not gone to the store. Money has nothing to do with her gifts. I do not know what is there physically. But I do know there is a piece of her heart wrapped to each one of us. It may be her favorite toy, or something she knows one of us can use or would like. They may be something she drew, painted or made. And in her purely loving spirit they are pure love. Her joy, and little explanation of "I knew you would like this, or you can use this when" is a true gift of giving.

Perhaps, each of us can consider ways to do the same in our lives. Is there a way, you can give in a very substantial way something that another would really appreciate? Maybe it is their favorite meal, cookie, pie or special family recipe cooked to perfection. Perhaps it is something of yours that they have always admired. Maybe it is a developing or deeper relationship. There are many who would love to have company or a visit. Is there a family member or friend that you have neglected to nurture in your relationship together. Offer to bring lunch, ask them to go to lunch or shopping. Take a routine activity and make it fun. Offer to start going for a walk together daily or once a week. Make a weekly date to get together. Imagine the possibilities. You will be creating the same anticipation of Christmas day any day of the year. Who is the giver? Who is the receiver? :) I believe just as on Christmas Morning, true joy, love and everlasting memories of comfort and joy can be shared any day of the year!

Some truths are right in front of us, yet we do may still not see them. We appear to be blinded by our perspective which seems to repeat itself over and over. Just like the math problem that we redo over and over, getting the same result but the wrong answer. Life can be that way too.

We may be aware that something is not right. The first impulse is to look at others in our life or environment and point a finger of blame. We resist our perceived reality, because it is not what we consciously desire. We want to run from it, hide from it, or escape it.

This truth may appear to have many faces: obesity, addiction, lonliness, depression, grief, unhappiness with relationship(s) or job/career. But those are really masks. What is behind the mask is the real truth. You believe the mask is real. And become a victim of what it appears to show you.

Often we try to deny or change who we are to fit the situation or emotion that we are feeling. We want an easy answer, a magic pill. We believe that if we "tough it out" things will get better or improve. We believe that it is happening to us from the outside. We do not want to take responsibility for the choices that we have made or not made to get us to this point. Now we realize where we are and cry out for injustice. We may often believe that something is wrong with us and may begin a cycle of self abuse that makes us feel even worse.

Consider, for a moment, what would it be like to honor those emotions and truths that are being revealed to you. Could it be that they are a gift from yourself to awaken you to what you are denying within yourself; that you are loveable, powerful, and beautiful. Have you been afraid to allow yourself to be that worthy of love, purpose and power? The truth or reality is yours to accept. Not as a declaration of future but of past and present moment. Name it. What is it for you?

Now, how does that make you feel about yourself? What is it telling you that has or has not happened to bring you to this present truth? You have already agreed that you do not want this as truth. I'll pick the first one on the list. Obesity. You think obesity is your truth because that is what you see. But that is only the veil, hiding the truth behind what the obesity is here to teach you. Your truth is not obesity, it is the pattern of behavior that you have been hiding behind to prevent you to become the happy confident person you are meant to be. What are you afraid of? What is it that you choose to deny or fail to pursue? What is your passion? How would you create the ideal you? What is holding you back from beginning that journey?

Your real truth is your spirit waiting for you to answer the call to be happy, fulfilled and full of life. When you are not in this state of bliss, you are given false realities to help you reclaim and discover who you really are, a spirit of pure love and light.

Do you want to move into the present moment to let go of your past, honor all that has brought you to this space and move forward to a better more empowered and happier you? Can you imagine?

I challenge you to honor yourself to face the parts if you and your life that you judge and do not like. What is the real truth behind what they are presenting you with?

I would be honored to work with you and guide you through this journey. As a Certified LifeLine Practitioner, I can help you get in touch with your desires. It is my calling to nurture and love. It is my purpose to learn to honor, love and walk as one with all, creating balance and harmony.

Debbie

Certified LifeLine Practitioner

630-730-1228

I want to share an experience with you. Last week I woke on Friday morning to find that I was too tired to get up. So the family all got up and ready on their own and I stayed in bed. The day went on and I found myself so consumed with fatigue that I could barely get up. After lunch I got up had something to eat and drink. As I focused on my emotions I just wanted to cry. An hour or so later I went to lay down again. When my husband, Ryan came home, he did a session with me. He is also a Certified LifeLine Practitioner. He combined it with other techniques he knows.

I gave the fatigue a voice. Many feelings that I had been suppressing emerged. Isolation, stressed, overwhelmed, frustrated, burdened, pushed away, ignored were some that came up. At the bottom of this pile was a general feeling of unloved and unappreciated, being dumped on. It all made perfect sense to me. I felt relief. An awareness and acknowledgement of where I was opened the door to moving forward. As I accepted that these were a part of me, I realized that my need to sleep was a way of my body saying take care of yourself. Snuggled in the comfort under the covers allowed me the space to regroup. The next morning I slept in again.

When I got up, one of my sons and husband began to make family breakfast. We all had a very nice conversation (it was not about me and how I felt, either) and meal. Then we all began to work at cleaning the house together. There was no resistance or anger or complaining. Everyone took responsibility for helping. There was teamwork, co-operation and love being offered and shared. Later, Ryan bought and prepared a scrumptious dinner and dessert. We all enjoyed the feelings of accomplishment and working together. It has been several days, and the feelings of working together has remained.

I am no longer feeling burdened. Allowing myself to voice how I was feeling and nurture myself was a catalyst for the whole family. We have all had a better week, been less stressed and enjoyed our space and each other more.

I am glad I have the tools and knowledge to work through symptoms. It has had a wonderful ripple effect for the family as well. I really cannot overemphasize how powerful the LifeLine Technique really is. I went from emotions at a high stress to none. Actually, quite the opposite, now I feel empowered, very happy and blessed. Our family is celebrating each other and working as a unit. Wow!

I so want to share this with you I am offering a session to you for half off. I also want to let you know that I offer a sliding scale. Inquire for details.

Love and Light to all.

Debbie